A Final Goodbye
by BonesBird
Summary: Jack and Hotch take a visit to Haley before her funeral. Set between "100" and "Slave Of Duty"


**Title: A Final Goodbye  
****Author: BonesBird  
****Summary: Jack and Hotch take a visit to Haley before her funeral. Set between 100 and Slave Of Duty  
****Disclaimer: I dunnae own nuzzink…  
****Lyrics: Slipped Away - Avril Lavigne**

_**

* * *

I miss you  
**__**Miss you so bad**_

Aaron Hotchner had been a single dad for three days. Just three days, and he was already struggling. Jessica, Emily, Penelope, his whole team, had been fantastic in trying to help him. Everything had changed so quickly for Jack that he was acting out. He hoped that bringing Jack to say a private farewell to his mother would help calm the 4 year old.

_**I don't forget you  
**__**Oh it's sad**_

"Daddy, why are we here?" he asked, as Hotch carried him into the reception of the chapel of rest. He sat Jack on the counter while someone came over to them.

"We're here to see Haley Hotchner" he said, "Closed casket" he added, knowing that Jack didn't need to see his mom the way she was now. "Jack, we're gonna say goodbye to your mom"

"I thought we did that at the fumeral?" he asked, taking his dads hand as they walked back.

_**I hope you can hear me  
**__**I remember it clearly**_

"At the funeral, Jack. Everybody else will say bye to mommy there, but we're special, so we get to say it here" Hotch explained as they were shown into a small room, where Haley's casket had been laid out

"Where's mommy" Jack asked, looking at Hotch confused

"Mommy is sound asleep in her special box, if you talk to her here, she can hear you"

_**The day you slipped away  
**__**Was the day I found it won't be the same**_

Hotch barely listened as Jack sat on the floor in front of the casket and spoke to her, this would be his last chance to talk to his mom, and Hotch wanted to give him every chance to tell her everything. He had spoken to the receptionist when he'd booked to have a few minutes alone, so Jessica was sat out in the waiting room.

_**I didn't get around to kiss you  
**__**Goodbye on the hand**_

He hoped that he could be the father Haley had wanted him to be. She had wanted him to be all manner of things he hadn't been for a long time. He'd been serious for so long he wasn't sure how he was to be around his son. The first few days hadn't been easy, but all they psychologists he'd spoken to had said that he would act out for a while, while he processed what had happened.

_**I wish that I could see you again  
**__**I know that I can't**_

All to soon Jack was tugging on his sleeve, Hotch looked down at his little boy, who had tears in his eye, and pulled him into a tight hug, he stood up and walked Jack over to the casket once more

"Tell mommy you love her" he whispered in Jack's ear, holding his son out as he leant towards the coffin. Jack put both his hands on the lid and kissed it

"I love you mommy" he said before Hotch carried him to the door, where he could see Jessica sat.

_**I hope you can hear me  
**__**Coz I remember it clearly**_

He waved once to her and shut the door again, walking over to the head of Haley's casket. He stood, silently. He didn't know what he could possibly say to her that would change anything. He didn't know how he could express his regret that it was she who wouldn't see their son grow up, with the dangers of his job. Hotch had never been this side of the death before.

_**The day you slipped away  
**__**Was the day I found it won't be the same**_

He ran his hand down the side of the casket, stopping at the handles and he saw himself reflected in the polish. He still had marks from the altercation with Foyet that had saved is son, but Hotch couldn't count that as a good thing when he hadn't been in time to save Haley.

_**I've had my wake up  
**__**Won't you wake up  
**__**I keep asking why**_

He thought to what he should say at her funeral. He knew what he wanted to say, he wanted to talk about how she was an amazing woman, a fantastic wife and a brilliant mother. He wanted to talk about all the love she had held in her heart.

_**And I can't take it  
**__**It wasn't fake  
**__**It happened you passed by**_

He wanted to stop the blame being placed on her for their divorce, he wanted to address his love and adoration for her. He wanted to express how much she had meant to him, how much she still meant to him. How he would never forget her, and would always remember her as being the woman she was with Jack, when they were happy.

_**Now you're gone  
**__**There you go  
**__**Somewhere I can't bring you back**_

He and Jack would need to move on, he was already emptying the house, putting it up for sale. He couldn't live there, despite all the happy memories he had, the memory of Foyet, and Haley, would forever stop him being able to live there. He knew it might take a long time to sell, houses where murder took place generally did, but he was happy to just be out and in his own apartment.

_**Now you're gone  
**__**There you go  
**__**Somewhere you're not coming back**_

He thought back to Haley's last words, her last words to Jack, her last words to him. Her last words to Jack had been words of love, and hope. Encouraging him to do whatever plan Hotch had taught him. Her last words to him had been instruction. Pleaded to him when she was most vulnerable.

_**The day you slipped away  
**__**Was the day I found it won't be the same**_

The words had caused him to pause, her requests were beyond what he thought of himself. He couldn't remember for certain what his response had been. He'd been too distressed at the thought of Foyet being near her, touching her, holding her. He had said something though.

_**The day you slipped away  
**__**Was the day I found it won't be the same**_

She had begged him to promise her, he hoped she'd heard that he had. He wanted to be certain, he placed both hands flat on the casket and leant down next to it.

"I promise you Haley, I promise to do the right thing for Jack. I love you"

He stood, and returned to his son.

_**I miss you**_

_**

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**_**I finished another fic last night, and I have another one in the works, so I'm hoping that I can give you something all the time. This is going up in response to Arwen's fic "Mommys Day" which is so beautiful. I honestly cried my eyes out. The two of us have a mutual appreciation society going on here.**


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